3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
