make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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