He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
