roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
