ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Randomize
