You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
