you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize