So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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