My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize