i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
