Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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