So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
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