I wanna passion pit in your ass
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
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He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
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You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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