Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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