love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
