is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
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