Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
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Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
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It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
why is half of my head shaved?
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