Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
