Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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