I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
can u get pink eye on your cock?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
me + whiskey = a bad person
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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