pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
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I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
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She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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