i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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