Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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