nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Randomize
