i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
NoShamevember. You game?
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize