Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
