i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
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