I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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