She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize
