I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize