There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
