so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
