update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
