how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
