i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I am spending my child support on dildos
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I would ride that face into the sunset
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
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