i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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