Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.