did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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