We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
