I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
