This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Dignity is for republicans.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
i drank out of a bidet.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
