Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
