Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
