goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize