Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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