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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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