I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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