I wannas sexs uuuuu
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
