My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Randomize
