i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize