I have demons in me.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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